"The Happiest Shopping Day Of Your Life": Dos And Don'ts In Wedding Dress Shopping

      One thousand apologies, brides, for my brief hiatus from the blog. January is when we receive all our new stock and I've found myself a bit preoccupied with shiny and pretty things. Ok, enough groveling, onto the point!
      Like many of these blogs, this one will start with a little story. Once upon a time, before I found myself immersed in the bridal world, I had a friend who got married. Knowing nothing about wedding dresses or bridal shops we...brace yourself...went to....maybe even cross yourself to be safe.....David's Bridal (as I type this I'm doing a very dramatic "hauck-puth" spitting sound). And on that oh so joyous trip to David's our swarthy and surly consultant literally did air quotes as she said in a bored and monotone voice "This is the happiest shopping day of your life."   Now it goes without saying that her charm did not win us over and we did not leave with a dress that day, but it did serve as a catalyst for me. It was then that I realized there are good and bad things one can do when buying a dress. Years later when I found myself on the other side of the equation, as a bridal consultant, this reality rang all the truer as I watched countless girls make the same mistakes as each other. Thus, I found myself inspired to write this helpful little blog to advise you how to make "the happiest shopping day of your life" an actually happy one.And in light of the fact that I just spoke of the D-word, let's start with the don'ts!
     1. Your guest list to dress shopping is not the same as the guest list to the wedding: Don't invite everyone you know.  Now anyone who has ever watched Say Yes To The Dress will know that you shouldn't have a big group. The pushy New York consultants seem to say it every episode, usually in the context of it causing them a lost sale, but they actually have a point. Your body conscious, single,  bitter, friend from high school might not actually enjoy watching you strut around in a mermaid gown as you gush about how excited you are to be married. And gush you should! But perhaps not with her present. The same goes for that pushy aunt who has always bought you random tacky presents for Christmas. Yes she will probably try to invite herself, but you aren't obligated to say "Yes, come give unsolicited and irrelevant opinions about my dress!"  You can politely explain that you are trying to keep the group limited to your closest friends or mom, but you would love for her to be a part of your dress experience in some other capacity, like alterations!
        Do: Invite people that work well with your personality.  If you are super opinionated, and your mom is super opinionated, and your sisters and friends are all super opinionated, it might not be the wisest decision to invite them. I've had a number of girls come in and buy dresses by themselves because they know what they like and they find themselves stressed out at the prospect of having others there. However, if you are laid back and love everybody, and can still make your own decision, invite the whole gang! Sometimes I'll find myself happily looking at a party of a dozen people that are coming to support the bride, and they actually do! The point: know yourself and know your needs when it comes to support.
      2. This is a shopping trip, not a fundraiser for cancer: Don't do the marathon: This is an easy trap to fall into. I myself made this mistake so I can understand it's appeal. You're excited about dress shopping and you want to make it like all your other shopping trips, which usually means scouring every store in the mall. However, understand that for whatever reason, dress shopping is different. It's more emotional, there's more weight to your decision, and you're often working with a variety of consultants that have their own effect on your disposition. What I've observed with the marathon approach is that after the first or second store girls have already found their dress, but have made such a grand affair out of the day that they feel obligated to keep going. By the 4th store they are so exhausted that it sort of ruins the day for them. I've had brides come in at the end of their marathon and they just aren't into it anymore.
       Do: Plan out your trips one shop at a time.  The shotgun approach of sending out several bullets and hoping to hit something is never the way to go with wedding dresses. Instead of planning to see every dress in the world, start out with a shop that has a few designers you like and go from there. If you still want to look after the first place, schedule another trip for another day. Be sure to allot ample time for reflection and rest between your trips to other stores, lest you find yourself starving, exhausted and sick of wedding dresses before you find "the one."
       3. You Don't Keep Dating After You're Engaged: Don't Keep Looking After You've Found It:
If I had a nickel for every time a girl broke down and sobbed at her joy of finding the perfect dress and then ended the appointment with "I just want to look at a few more shops" I would have enough nickles to buy myself a second glass of iced tea to drink while I write this. Inevitably, these girls come back a few days later and buy the dress, or go on and wear themselves out until they have forgotten about "the one" and settle for something they don't love as much, because they're tired and the sales girl is pushy.  I'm not saying you have to buy it the second the tears start flowing, but don't feel like you have to see every dress in the greater United States before you commit to one.
       Do: Savor the moment: Remember when you first got engaged how excited you were? You didn't take the ring and then pull out the little black book to make a "just in case he isn't the one" date; you threw parties and called friends and sent pictures of the ring to every vague acquaintance in your address book! When you find the dress, even if you think you may need to sleep on making a decision, make sure to just take time to savor it. Look at pictures of it online and see it in pretty lighting, think about what kinds of accessories you can pair with it, what bridesmaids dresses you'd choose and whether you know any E.M.Ts you can invite to revive your fiance when he sees you in it. Sometimes I think we're so conditioned to want the next best thing that we can't stop and appreciate our dress, we instead keep looking to see if it matches the Jones'. Don't let your wedding dress hold the same value as your iphone. It's special and deserves a little extra sentimentality than just trying to one up it.

The moral of the story is this: in 20 years your daughter is going to say you were out of your mind for wearing that, and your husband is still going to get a dreamy look in his eye when he remembers seeing you at the top of the aisle on your wedding day. Let the process of finding that dress be as good as it can possibly be, and don't cheapen it!

Brace Yo'self Brides, It's Christmas With Your In Laws!: Pulling Off Your First Christmas At Your Place! (Part 1)

       No less than the two weeks after we got back from our honeymoon my husband and I were hosting Mothers' Day at our place. Within the span of a few short days we found furniture, planned a menu, decorated and stocked our fridge. Needless to say, 10 months later, everyone was quite surprised at the contrast at Christmas when our place was in much better shape for hosting. Now fortunately, my in laws were very gracious and forgiving of the state of our place that first holiday, but I still felt like I had to compensate come Christmas time. Between general in-law tensions, the seemingly insurmountable amount of cooking required, and the stress of decorating on a budget, hosting your first Christmas can be a very scary task indeed. Thus, we're running a series of holiday-inspired blogs to help you from start to finish. If you  are so grateful for the help you feel compelled to thank us with Christmas presents, we like diamonds, ponies and anything with a dead president's face on it.

     Step One: Decorating
As a chronic Planet Earth junkie, I am always quite entertained by the Bird of Paradise's compulsion to fill its nesting space with shiny things. Come December 1st, I find myself doing the very same thing. Here are some fun sparkly things you can DIY that'll trick your M.I.L. into thinking you've received a hefty Christmas bonus.

 

Spray paint long pretty branches with silver paint and then a spray adhesive, then roll them in chunky glitter, drop them in a cool vase and you have a beautiful centerpiece.

I love the juxtaposition of rugged and earthy branches and pine cones with really sparkly ornaments and votives. Most of these materials can be found on a walk around the neighborhood, but the vases and frames can be found at a nearby Ross or TJ Maxx, and little ornaments can be found in any Dollar Store or Target.
Need more sparkle? Try out these mason jars, light bulbs, or wine bottles!
Now maybe you haven't caught the sparkle bug, and though I pity you for missing out on its awesomeness, I still believe you can pull off a pretty amazing look in your house. If shiny metallics aren't your bag, try a softer (literally) look with these felted goodies:

Cut circles, hearts, snowflakes or whatever your fancy is and hot glue them in layers over a styrafoam cone. Add little pearls, buttons, or beads to the centers of each shape for an added touch!

This is a bit more time intensive (I know because I'm currently 3/4 the way through one) but they're very easy if you have time. Just follow the tutorial and hot glue them to a cardboard cutout or a wreath form. For more open roses (like in the picture) start rolling from the inside of the circle instead of the outside.
If sparkle is too gaudy and felt is too foofy, you may need a more classic and understated look. Here are some ideas for those who prefer to appreciate (and in this case raid) the simplicity of nature and create more natural looks.

Hot glue the backs of pine cones to a styrafoam ball and dust with white spray paint, or just embellish with a plaid ribbon. These cute little balls make for really cool alternative centerpieces if you hang them low over your table.

A little bit of shrubbery and some raw cranberries (or holly berries) thrown in a mason jar full of water make for a beautiful centerpiece. Add a floating candle to illuminate the room, or throw a few small pretty branches in the jar for a more vertical look.

This is so basic and straightforward but I LOVE the look of the actual socks hanging in the really rustic house....although, if you want to impress your in-laws, I suggest you buy new socks instead of rooting through your laundry pile.
Brides, with these handy and easy decorations your apartment will look so gorgeous that your mother-in-law may even be too distracted by all the beauty to pull out her white glove and wipe down your surfaces! Tune in next time to learn how to keep the distraction going with delicious appetizers and easy meals!

-Christina.

"Another flask with my initials? Thanks Pal!"; Some Good Alternative Bridesmaid Gifts.

Maybe it is because I've been a bridesmaid enough times to shame Katherine Heigel, or maybe it's because if I receive another thing with my old initials (C.R.Y) on it I'll claw my eyes out, but I feel slightly passionate about this issue. Here's the thing, brides: with the exception of your surly 2nd cousin or your old friend from elementary school that you had to ask because you made a blood pact to be in each other's weddings, your bridesmaids are all probably pretty awesome. Also, they have probably spent several hundred dollars on planning all your showers, teas, engagement parties, mixers, and let's not forget, buying that god-awful, peach, taffeta dress that you swear they'll wear again. Thus, you should thank them with something thoughtful and personal. Look at this as an opportunity to be creative and individualistic. Consider your friends, your wedding, and what you'd enjoy getting. Whether you want to go the sentimental, the practical, or the quirky route is entirely up to you; but here are some ideas to help you along.


1. Accessory Kit: Instead of buying a pair of earrings or a necklace that they can only ever wear at your wedding, make it a fun project. Buy your girls scarves, earrings, bracelets, headbands, textured tights, clutches or whatever strikes your fancy! The nice part about this idea is that you can really tailor each kit to each girl. If you have a bridesmaid who loves herself some bling then buy her more earrings and sparklies while you give your plainer, surly, second cousin more practical things like cute mittens, and classic studs. The sky is truly the limit with this gift. You can go as expensive or inexpensive as your budget requires. Got the dough? Throw a Tiffany's bracelet in there! Broke like a joke? Raid the antique stores around you to find some really cool old broaches, or the Internet for some awesome handmade stuff. Just be creative!

2. Gadgets: If you're the kind of gal that gets goosebumps over Gs instead of glittery things, then don't force it. (Enough alliteration, I promise!) Get your bridesmaids an ipod shuffle (or touch if you've got the cash), or a really awesome automatic wine opener, or accesories for their favorite gadgets like an iphone cover or a case for the laptop. Your friends will love being spoiled with the cool new technologies that they haven't discovered or bought yet!

I love the new Rabbit and I don't even drink wine!

3. DIY Masterpieces: To say you have to spend a lot of money in order to give your maids something cool is pretty much absurd. If you've got a limited budget, don't spend so much on the girls that it'll leave Ramen and Tang on the menu! Instead, consider stretching your creative muscles and making something totally fun. If you can use a pair of knitting needles or a crochet hook consider doing something like this knitted coffee sleeve paired with a Starbucks giftcard:

If you can't cable, you can garter stitch and add cool buttons or felt flowers instead!

Or if you sew, make the girls awesome ear-warmers:

Make sure to get creative with your designs!

Or an awesome clutch like this one! 

You can use different patterned fabrics for each girl!

The point is, with sites like etsy and pinterest, you have no shortage of available ideas.  Sure the knot.com is awesome for most of your planning but, dear betrothed friends, do not limit yourself to its store for gift ideas! Now get out there and thank your girls right now! 

How-to Beauty: fresh and dewy

Susan here!

Here is a tutorial I've created for that fresh, dewy, natural looking makeup that is so now. Listed below are all the products I used to achieve this look (and links to find them online!). Check it out and let me know what you think :)

1. Neutrogena's Oil-Free Acne Wash: Even though I'm lucky enough never to have had have acne, I'm still in love with this product. It lathers up nicely, and smells very clean and fresh.

2. Neutrogena's Visibly Even Daily Moisturizer SPF 30: Brightens up and evens out the skin tone while using the perfect amount of daily SPF. 

3. Bare Escentuals - PRIME TIME: I love this stuff. There are a lot of foundation primers that really work out there and I've used them all, and recommend many of them. This is what I used today.

4. REVLON ColorStay Mineral Mousse: (in number #50) Can be a bit heavy since it's a mousse so feel free to use a tinted moisturizer or lighter foundation in place of this. 

5. stila illuminating liquid foundation: (in 10 watts) One of the best light-weight liquid foundations... plus it has that sheer shine we're going for.

6. Bare Minerals - mineral veil: Great finishing powder. Very sheer - no color coverage.

7. Bare Minerals - bronzer: One of my favorite bronzers... though be careful, bronzer is a slippery slope! lol

8. LORAC Blush: (in desire) This blush is fantastic, and this particular pigment has some sheen to it... which I love.

9. Bare Minerals - illuminating mineral veil: I can't talk any more highly about this product. It helps create the sheen on the cheekbones and browbone that we really want. 

10. Urban Decay - NAKED eyeshadow palette: This is probably the most used product I have. There is a wide range of colors so it's versatile for any look you're trying to achieve. Invest in this guy... you'll use it every day!

11. Bare Escentuals - BUXOM lash: Wow. just wow. 

12. Lip Fusion XL: Plumps up those puckers! 

13. smashbox - the nude lip pencil: (in fair) Great color, soft and easy to apply.

14. smashbox - lip enhancing glass, sheer color: (in pop) The sheer color is lovely. My only complaint is that because it's a brush, it frays after a few uses (from pushing it back into the tube!) and can turn out looking like a dandelion after a while (but I still love it).

15. OLAY age defying intensive nourishing night cream: So when you make your way home after a long night out and are ready to crawl into bed, smooth some of this over your skin and thank me in the morning.

--Susan. 

Sound Bridal Advice: our pal Elmo

This morning as I was helping a wonderfully laid back bride, I had an interesting thought, "Why is it that brides sometimes lose their identity in their wedding?" You see, at the beginning of the appointment, my bride (who showed up in a T-shirt and jeans) requested a very beaded and extravagant look, that she didn't actually want. By the middle of the appointment I had identified the problem and we found a simple ruched gown (that looked awesome on her) that was more up her alley. The problem is, this bride is not alone. Why is it that the second a dreamy man puts a ring on our finger we forget who we are and what we like? Are we so caught up in being brides we've forgotten Sesame Street's mantra of "Be yourself"?  Thus, I've compiled a list of the top 3 areas that seem to be problematic for a gal's ability to remain true to herself.

Try an unconventional aisle runner!

1. Traditions: When I got married the number one thing that stressed me out was superfluous traditions imposed upon me by wedding websites and well meaning aquaintances. Don't get me wrong, there are certian traditions that exist because they are good and polite and meaningful (yes, you still have to write thank you cards!), but there are others that may not be your cup of tea, and that is ok! These days half the brides who walk through our doors don't buy veils, wear white shoes, walk down the aisle to the wedding march, or light unity candles. I've been to black tie weddings with full 7 course meals and open bars, and weddings where we ate barbeque and the bride walked down the aisle to the song from Pirates of The Caribbean. Would I make all the decisions these brides did? No. But I did walk away thinking, "wow, that wedding was so (insert the bride and groom's names here)"... and that made me really, really happy.

Cowboy boots are way more fun than dyed shoes!

2. Attire: I mentioned it before, but it bears repeating: you don't have to wear what everyone else is wearing! If you want to be encrusted head to toe with crystals and lace and be the bridey-est bride that ever existed then more power to you! And if you want to wear Toms under your dress and a Dallas Cowboys garter, because your man loves him some Tony Romo, then I will support you wholeheartedly.

Let a friend bake cupcakes instead!

3. Wedding Details: The best thing that you can do to keep your wedding planning organized is using tools like Theknot.com or Martha Stewart's online checklist. Here you'll find every single detail you'll need to keep track of listed out, so that you can be reminded of what to do (and when). However, I quickly learned that many of the details these sites suggest are simply not things that I care about. I never had to check "research linens", "customize your lighting", "create personalized monogram to project on the dance floor", or "decide on your ice sculpture" off my list, because I was fine with my venue's linens, I was getting married in a well lit room, I couldn't care less about monograms, and I did not want any sort of ice sculpture. You truly don't have to care about every little detail! (you really don't). If you're indifferent about the cake flavor, let your fiance or the maid of honor do the tasting. If you know a great florist give them a little creative freedom. By letting go of some of the details, you'll be a much more relaxed bride, and you won't find yourself with a wedding that is full of things you really don't love or need.

If being yourself involves this cake, maybe reconsider... ;)

The bottom line is this: There are a million details in a wedding... if you stress about each one or try and make decisions based on what you think is expected of you, you'll find yourself in a wedding that isn't yours and wearing a beanie instead of a veil to cover the bald patches from pulling your hair out. :) Remember our friend Elmo, and be yourself ladies!

Our Family Album: an introduction

My father in law is the most diligent scrap-booker I've ever met in my life. Every event, milestone, and person that is vaguely connected with our family gets put in chronological order with colorful backgrounds and witty comments.
       Why do you care about my father in law's compulsion to dicut? Well, as you probably feared, this is the part where I create a corny analogy and say that all of us at Rin's are a family at this point. (After all, when you think about the reality shows out there [it's all true!] you'll understand how we gain a sense of solidarity with co workers that can only be summed up as family!). And so in the spirit of my father in law, I'm beginning this blog with a little family album that introduces us to you!




Rin with David Tutera at Chicago Market.

Rin: A few moons ago Rin moved to the states from Thailand and opened her own shop. 30 years later, after learning English, developing a foundational knowledge of the bridal world, persevering through economic peaks and pits, and weathering the pouf sleeves of the 80s and the basque-waisted 90s, Rin has created one of the premiere bridal salons of the Bay Area. When she isn't doing the miriage of things that a shop owner does, Rin can be found volunteering for her local Bhuddist temple, helping the relief efforts for the floods in Thailand, or spending time with her husband and two sons.


Susan on the drive to Tahoe.

Susan: After traveling the world (including a long stint in Australia!) to complete her degree in Fashion Design, this Chicago native decided to place her roots in the Bay Area. Susan's eye for design and knowledge of sewing has proved to be an invaluable asset as she can see how each and every dress can be modified to custom fit each bride's needs and tastes. I can think of a number of times Susan has suggested raising a waistline, adding appliques, or pairing a dress with an accessory that completely makes the dress for the bride! Susan's interest in bridal took a noteworthy turn a couple months ago when she went to Market for the first time. Within 2 weeks of returning she had designed several gowns and hand sewn and beaded the first one! When she's not designing each bride's personal look or making gowns of her own, Susan can be found waist deep in the world of fashion. In addition to designing clothing, she also has done the makeup and hair for photo shoots, fashion shows, and film. This fashion knowledge will be shared on the blog, as Susan will be posting weekly fashion, makeup and hair tips and tutorials, as well as a mix of all things relevant.

Anabel in Las Vegas.

Anabel: There never was a Jack of all trades that could hold a candle to our Anabel. On any given day you will find her showing dresses, maintaining all of our office work, mending samples, helping with alterations, or helping translate for our Hispanic brides. She wears many hats, and she wears each one of them tremendously well. We all became acutely aware of just how much Anabel does when she went on maternity leave in the summer to have her adorable son, Antonio. However, despite our panic and dread, the apocalypse didn't come over those 3 months she was gone, and we welcomed her back in the fall. When she's not holding down the fort here, she can be found spending time with her family, playing with her adorable son, and watching Spongebob with her nieces.

Julie with her American Paint horse "Jack" at a show.

Julie: After 14 years in the bridal business, Julie is our resident expert. She started at The Unique Bride right out of high school and has worked with every designer under the sun (and many of the personalities you see hosting their own bridal shows now!). With nothing more than a few descriptive words Julie can track down the perfect dress for every bride's style, body type, and budget. When she isn't in the shop, Julie is found defending her title of Turner Classic Movie trivia champion, and promoting and showing her American Paint horse, "Invite Only Zippen," aka "Jack". In the past few years she's won enough buckles to decorate the belts of every cowboy in Texas, and read enough books to keep Amazon in business, but she still finds time to keep up to date on all things bridal!




Patricia frolicking in a field.

Patricia: Patricia gives Julie a run for her money in years of experience, clocking in at over 9! She came to Rin's several years ago and has been keeping herself busy ever since! Even in the slow seasons, Patricia is constantly on the move, doing everything from updating all our catalogs to painting window displays! Brides find Patricia to be refreshingly laid back, and very efficient in finding what they're looking for. Outside of the shop, Patricia loves cooking, gardening, reading, working out and spending a night out with the girls.



Christina in Disneyland with her hubby.

Christina: Last but not least, there's me. I've been in bridal for a couple years now, and find it to be one of the most interesting occupations imaginable (take that as you will!). I started in bridal after my own dress shopping experiences (which included everything from a consultant telling me "I didn't talk to you much at first because you looked like you could be a "bridezilla" to another one offering to knock of $5 if I bought the dress from her instead of the super sweet consultant that originally showed it to me). My degree in English and my love for finding crafty ways to be cheap inspired me to start this blog with Susan. While Susan educates you on all things relevant, I will be showing you how to balance out your budget by DIYing your way down the aisle. With the help of my bff Martha, and a little bit of modge podge we'll make all your bridal dreams come true....or at least make you throw up from our shameless cheeziness!